I love it when someone tries to argue that they are right because the other person just doesn't get it. Never stop to consider that maybe your argument is flawed. Just accuse the other person of not getting your argument and move on.
Maybe your argument is ungettable.
Let's look at what our famous young art student has been up to defending her "Nice Guys Rape" poster.
http://feministartdegree.tumblr.com/post/39442800441/trigger-warning-rape-rape-culture
Someone called Loaded For Bear posted a fair rebuttal. He basically says that, once someone commits rape, they prove that they are not a nice person. The rapist was only pretending to be nice in the first place.
This makes sense to me, but of course, I just don't get it.
Feminist Art Degree sets me straight (in caps, so I know she's serious).
BY TELLING ME HOW TO DEFINE MY ASSAULTER YOU ARE PARTICIPATING IN RAPE CULTURE.
Hmm... Nobody told you how to define your assaulter. They simply defined your assaulter. Assaulters aren't nice people. You can believe whatever you want to about the person.
BY TELLING ME TO DEFINE MY ASSAULTER AS SOLELY “A MONSTER” YOU ARE TAKING AWAY MY RIGHT TO DEFINE THEM AS I SO PLEASE.
Again, believe what you want to believe. Reality is separate.
BY TELLING ME TO DEFINE MY ASSAULTER AS SOLELY “A MONSTER” YOU ARE TAKING AWAY MY RIGHT TO MY OWN ASSAULT NARRATIVE, WHICH I ALONE LIVED.
That narrative in your head is your own business. Again, narrate away. The truth exists independant of narrative.
BY TELLING ME ONLY MONSTERS RAPE YOU ARE NEGATING THE INFINITE ASSAULT STORIES OF PEOPLE WHO WERE RAPED BY NICE PEOPLE.
Negating? I'm not sure that's the word. Infinite assault stories? Wow, does that mean the stories are infinitely long or that there is an infinite supply? Human existence is finite, so... stories of any kind are kind of finite.
Let's offer some creative criticism here. Let's say that nice people don't rape, but, many people have been raped by nasty people pretending to be nice.
BY TELLING ME ONLY MONSTERS RAPE YOU ARE PERPETUATING RAPE CULTURE’S IDEA OF THE “IDEAL RAPE”; THAT ONLY CERTAIN ASSAULTS COUNT BY BEING DEFINED WITHIN NARROW PARAMETERS; THAT IF YOU “DIDN’T FIGHT BACK/WERE DRUNK/WERE BOUGHT DINNER/THEY WERE NICE”/ETC, IT WASN’T REALLY RAPE.
By telling me that only certain assaults count, you are being asked to define rape. Rape has a definition. For a general definition, see
Wikipedia:
Rape is a type of
sexual assault usually involving
sexual intercourse, which is initiated by one or more persons against another person without that person's
consent.
BY TELLING ME NICE GUYS DON’T RAPE- “WOULD NEVER DO SUCH A THING”- YOU ARE LETTING SAID NICE PEOPLE WHO DO RAPE OFF THE HOOK.
No, you are denying me the right to define nice guys as people who do not do things that are not nice. Pretending to be nice in order to get into a position where one can commit rape is not only a crime against the victim, it is an offence against nice guys. The deception is just another part of the overall malevolent nature of the person.
BY TELLING ME NICE GUYS DON’T RAPE- “WOULD NEVER DO SUCH A THING”- YOU ARE CONTINUING TO PERPETUATE RAPE CULTURE’S IDEAL RAPE NARRATIVE AND IGNORING ALL THE ACTUAL, REAL, LEGITIMATE RAPES THAT OCCUR OUTSIDE OF THOSE DEFINITIONS.
D O
Y O U
F U C K I N G
U N D E R S T A N D
No, I don't understand. Rape Culture is a myth. I might as well say, by not clapping your hands behind your back three times before speaking you are perpetuating the evil reign of the Invisible Monkey Brain. In order to understand, I'd have to believe in it. You are trying to control the narrative.
Say I have a friend named Barry. Now I think that Barry is a nice guy. But, when I invite him into my house, he waits until I'm comfortable and then punches me in the face, knocks me unconscious and steals my belongings. "Well," I say, "he's really a nice guy." If you try to tell me that Barry is really an asshole pretending to be a nice guy is that defining my narrative? Is it participating in a theft and assault culture? No, it's telling it like it is. Barry was never a nice guy.
If, on the other hand, Barry and I participate in Mixed Martial Arts and he knocks me unconscious, it is entirely possible that he is a nice guy. Even if, one time, I tried to tap out and he didn't see it and knocked me silly. It was a mistake, and nice guys do make them.
So, I can say that someone punched me in the face and is still a nice guy, but, I can't say that someone assaulted me and is still a nice guy. There is a big difference. Assault is a crime and it is intentional and involuntary on the part of the victim.
Rape is a crime. It is not allowed or enabled in any culture in which I participate. I find rape repulsive and I also find it repulsive for someone to include anyone who commits rape in the category of nice people.
I refuse to "get" any statement that makes such a claim.